The Flaw in the Plan

It’s been a while. So much has happened this month that I don’t know where to begin. So I will start with the one event that led to all of the other events occuring.

Now time for a deep breath. I got my BFP! Last Monday, I took a pregnancy test and saw a faint line. Five tests later with a digital, I can happily say I am pregnant with our first little witch or wizard. It was such a euphoric feeling to see that double line and know a little life is growing inside of you. The feelings of joy and excitement are beyond words.

Now this led to a pretty tense and dangerous week. I had a great way of surprising MJ planned with a puzzle that said he was going to be a daddy with a fun t-shirt he can wear for bragging rights at work. However, this idea did not even go close according to plan. Let’s go through the rest of the week.

Monday: Found out I’m pregnant and beyond ecstatic to be pregnant with our first child. Made an appointment with OBGYN to make sure Padfoot aka baby is alright.

Tuesday: Met with our Midwife, not OBGYN, to go over what to expect over the trimester. I am 4 weeks and it is too early to see anything on ultrasouns. Bloodwork done and told to set up appointment in two weeks with MFM doctor in practice.

Now here is where it gets crazy. I was told to keep riding horses till 12 weeks because it is still safe and not to worry. I am a safe rider and have been riding for most of my life, so riding horses is not dangerous for me and I rarely ever fall. Anyways, I went horseback riding that night like usual because doctor told me to continue until 12 weeks. Well, let’s just say one minute I’m on the horse and next I’m on the ground unconscious. No, I didn’t get thrown or fall per say.


A damn seizure for heavens’ sake while riding. The first one I ever had in my entire life. I never had a seizure before and still don’t remember a thing about it, just brief images in an order that makes no sense.  I still can’t believe it happened and it happened to me.

Off to the hospital I was rushed and after a X-Ray and ct scan with dye imaging (against my will but I was unconscious damn it), annoying neck brace of doom, minor concussion, and 5 hours later, I was released to go home. No broken bones, sprains, twists, and only a minor concussion, sore muscles, and extremely bruised pride, I am fine and so is Padfoot for all I know. MJ found out I was pregnant from EMTs and well, my whole plan went out the window. He was excited to be a dad.

Wednesday: Sore muscles, lots of pain due to that soreness, and tiredness with plenty of catnaps before the Holidays. Padfoot was still fine but I was in loopy land all day. Couldn’t even tell you what I did that day due to the concussion.

Thursday: Thanksgiving! Spent the day with family still loopy and helping to cook as long as I stayed away from pointy and hot objects. Let’s say it’s hard to make a salad without a damn cutting knife. Also found out from my mom that she has epilepsy over dinner after sharing news of seizure and then being told I probably have it too. Mind blown there and now have to go in for testing. Apparently pregnancy can be a trigger for epilepsy according to google.

Friday: More Thanksgiving dinners and I was allowed to use a cutting knife this time! Not quite out of loopy land but coherent enough not to cut fingers off and able to think more about the consequences for Padfoot from the fall.

Weekend: Completely out of loopy land and now in panic mode.

The consequences of my first seizure are unknown. The health of my baby is uncertain and that scares me. No miscarriage at the moment but the damage is done from the hospital tests and traumatic fall. I want to believe that my Padfoot is completely unharmed and I can go back to my earlier excitement. However, I am not naive. I know only time will tell if Padfoot is unaffected and I have two calls to make tomorrow. One to my OBGYN about the possible consequences due to an event out of my control and the stupid doctors decisions to perform hospital tests on me while I was unconscious and my normal doctor for epilepsy testing.

Only time will tell if I will still get my happy healthy baby or that I harmed my baby irrevocably because of an event out of my control. Please let everything be all right.



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